Down the Beaten Road
by Nicole Alexandra
Summary: two lives change drastically in an escape from the comforts of home.
1. Default Chapter

Author: Nicole Alexandra  
Title: Down The Beaten Road  
Rating: Solid PG-13 so far… it will progress though(adult situations)  
Summary: An unexpected life comes when two of the Roswellian gang are forced into a difficult situation after a night of lust.  
Category: M&M  
Feedback: Please. Iris2003gl@yahoo.com   
Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters are property of UPN, Jason Katims, and Melinda Metz   
  
Author's Note: I wrote this fic for a specific purpose. After a day of reading fanfic I realized how much all those happily ever after teen pregnancy storied make me want to gag. I myself am not a pregnant teen but real life doesn't work out in a fairy tale ending. My purpose was to write the story and yes have the alien other wordly Roswell vibe but also depict a more realistic story. I also experimented with the duel POV thing so tell me what you think. Enjoy!  
  
Dedications: To all the TRUEbies, Courtney, Liz especially for betaing and giving me feedback, and Laura. Also to Lindsay who actually is a teen mother, as well as Sonya who gave me the idea for this story.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
Part 1  
  
  
  
"Michael..." The words seemed to just flow. I didn't know where they came from.  
  
It was one of those moments when time just slows down. There's no controlling it. Each moment plays out over an eternity, each word uttered takes days to complete. I swallowed hard and fought newly emerging tears. I had to be strong.   
  
I just stared up at him. "I didn't even think I should tell you this, I mean you already have so much going on, but it wouldn't be right if I didn't." Breathe, I told myself. Just breathe. "I think I'm..." My voice just stopped. It didn't skip or fade out, it just stopped.   
  
Deep breath. "I think I'm..." Why was so hard? Shouldn't it be a little easier than this? "I think that I could possibly be..." That's a lie, in fact I was almost certain I was." I am pregnant."   
  
I somehow thought just saying it would make me feel a little better, it didn't. God and the way he looked at me. It just made it worse. I bet he thought I did it on purpose. Just so he'd have to stick around. Maybe I should've lied just so he could choose to leave.   
  
Uncomfortable silence inevitably followed. "I just thought you should know. I don't expect anything. I mean I am perfectly capable of handling things by myself."  
  
Oh I had a smart choice of words. I was sure he'd probably start running fro the door, after all that's what Michael Guerin did best, run. His gaze stayed unwavering. I couldn't help but squirm.  
  
In one simple gesture he grabbed my arm pulling me into his chest and holding me tightly. I hadn't pictured this scenario. I let the warmth of his body heat mine. I felt him kiss the top of my head.  
  
"I'm scared Michael." I looked up. I could feel the tears running down my cheeks. Michael nodded.   
Somehow most of my night ended up being spent in Michael's arms, Michael's warm, strong, amazing arms, and there things didn't seem as terrible.  
  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I was just waiting for one of Maria's rants. I hadn't expected what she was saying. My mind began to race off into a thousand different places. Why? When? I mean we were always careful, at least I thought we were. And of all times for this to come this was not a great time.   
  
I watched her mouth as she said my name.  
  
"Michael..."  
  
I didn't understand what was so hard about talking until I found out what she was trying to say. I think I got it at the second attempt. I stood there like an idiot. I should've said something. After a few moments of brain freeze she started in again. She had just said the most horrifying three worlds of any words that could ever be uttered.  
  
I knew what she was saying was true, she could take care of herself, but I didn't want her to. I want to be the one to take care of her. I brought her into my embrace. I thought maybe it would calm both of us down.  
  
She was scared she told me so. The shock hadn't set in for me yet. Otherwise I would've been scared out of my mind. I mean I was a senior in high school, which of course was bad enough, but add all the alien crap, and things were just complicated.  
  
The only thing I could think about was Maria right now though. Skins didn't matter, Khivar didn't matter, Liz, Isabel, Max, and Tess couldn't matter right now.   
  
"I'm scared." The words were imprinted on my brain replaying over and over like a broken record. Scared was an understatement. Terrified, horrified, shocked, and nauseated fit well, but not scared. Scared was what you felt about a playground bully or Hank, take your pick. This was a moment that would change my life, a consequence coming back to haunt me.  
  
"I should tell Max." I whispered to her.  
  
She shook her head in my chest.   
  
"Please don't Michael." I felt my heart sink.   
  
"Ok, I won't."  
  
She pulled away moving her eyes to meet mine. "Lets go...Lets just leave. We could make a new life. I mean stay here a couple weeks then just leave. Pick a town and go."  
  
"Maria, I don't know if...I mean what about..." I stopped. How could I say no. It was all in her eyes, every reason I should go with her and just forget about Roswell and a chance at going home. I nodded.  
  
"Lets go."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
"Are you sure? It's not too late to turn back."   
  
I watched as the sign moved further and further away. 'Thank You for Visiting Roswell Come Again."  
  
She nodded. "I'm sure. I've never been more sure." Somehow a little unsure ness must've surfaced during that spiel.  
  
The rest of the four-hour drive went incredibly fast. With the occasional whimper of hunger Maria and I were silent. The stillness was an uncomfortable at first but it soon became relaxing. "Michael I'm sorry." Her voice was quiet as we pulled into the motel parking lot.  
  
I parked and stood there. What was I supposed to do? My mind searched rapidly for something to say.  
  
"I never ever wanted this. I am just sorry to drag you away from everything."  
  
I closed my eyes leaning my forehead against the smooth leather of the steering wheel.  
  
"Maria," I sat up urging he chin towards me, "this isn't exactly what I had in mind either, but I got it. I know we can do this. " I tried to smile. I was never very good at this comforting thing. It just wasn't me.  
  
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."  
  
The words stung. What if we were wrong? What happened then? We had no friends or family, no one to turn to. "We have to be strong." I grabbed for her hand. "I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." I tried to smile but it just didn't work out.  
  
She tried to return the gesture half hearted. "Lets go inside." I felt the car give a slight rattle as she slammed her car door. I mimicked her motions as we ran into the motel.  
  
The room was cheesy to say the least. The fabric of the comforter had quite a few spots on it; the curtains had a thick layer of dust coating the polyester designs, and a scent of mold. "Home sweet home." I mumbled under my breath.  
  
Maria sat on the bed laying her head against one of the pillows. I moved next to her lying on my stomach.  
"I have something for you." I reached into my back pocket pulling out a small envelope that had been folded.   
  
I watched as her slender fingers carefully smoothed the edges and opened the crisp paper. "It's a license."  
  
I nodded.  
  
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."  
  
I nodded again.   
  
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?" She hesitated.   
  
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"  
  
I nodded again.  
  
I pulled out mine, handing it to her quickly.  
  
"Your Darick Ross? Why these names?"  
  
"I figured someone's going to eventually come looking."  
  
She nodded putting the license in her handbag. She rested one hand on her stomach and one on the bed. I reached my hand to the one on her stomach, touching it lightly.   
  
"Our baby's in there?"   
  
She nodded. "Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..." She stopped and I was glad she did. I didn't want to hear the rest. That was a terrible idea. I mean two high school seniors raising a child was bad but just throwing away a life... that was even worse.  
  
I shook my head. "We can do this." My eyes met her's and her lips began to curve into a smile. That moment quickly broke away.   
  
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?"  
  
That had sort of slipped my mind. Of course I mean somewhere deep down I had realized it, the idea just hadn't surfaced. I could feel the pit of my stomach churn.   
  
"I mean they do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." She stopped. I guess she could see the fear that had just slammed into my chest.  
  
"What are we going to do?" Her eyes were big and bright, filled with just as much fear as my body.  
  
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Roswell was behind now. I was on the road. I looked over to Michael, his gaze never unchanging from the road. He acted completely indifferent. I gave an occasional stir to break the silence.  
  
"Are you sure?"  
  
I nodded and mumbled under my breath. Inhale, exhale, I told myself.  
  
  
"Michael, I'm sorry." I blurted out as we pulled into the parking lot of some less than one star hotel.  
  
He sat there quiet, so I continued. "I never wanted this. I didn't mean to drag you away from everything."  
  
We finally got in the hotel room. My body was completely stiff. He said a few words but my mind had already begun to wander.  
  
"Michael what about school? What about a life? Maybe you were right. Maybe leaving was a bad idea. We don't even have jobs."  
  
All the 'What ifs' had inevitably began to sink in. I felt hot tears sting at my eyes. I knew he had to be thinking the same thing I was.   
  
I felt his strong, warm fingers wrap around my hand.   
  
"We have to be strong. I promise Maria, nothing bad will happen." He was trying, he was trying really hard. But deep down I knew, I could see it in his eyes, he was just as scared as me. We were separated from our friends, family, everything that as vaguely familiar.  
  
I tried I really did, I tried to return his smile, it just didn't happen. There was nothing to smile about. Our lives had just basically ended.  
  
When we got in the hotel room there was an apparent thin sheet of dust covering everything. The curtains had to have been up since 1970 and the comforter had odd stains all over it.   
  
As I lay down on the bed Michael joined me. "I have something for you?"  
  
He handed me a small envelope. I opened it slowly and pulled the first object out. "Its a license."  
  
"A license for Elizabeth Ross."  
  
"Who is Elizabeth Ross?"  
  
I stopped. Elizabeth Ross. I had no idea who that was. My mind raced trying to think of some significance of the name. My heart stopped as I saw the picture. It was me.  
  
"Am I Elizabeth Ross?"  
  
He nodded pulling out his own fake license. "You're Darick Ross. Why these names?"  
  
He moved his gaze away. "I figured someone would eventually come looking."  
  
I felt his the rough skin of his palm on my stomach. I closed my eyes.  
  
"Our baby's in there?"  
  
My mind went blank. I couldn't really say anything. I just hesitantly moved my head up and down. I could feel my chest tighten. Somewhere the idea popped into my head. I didn't want to say. I never even considered the option. It really hadn't been one until that moment.  
  
""Michael...It isn't too late to go back. I could always take care of this baby there...or maybe even..."  
I stopped. I just couldn't get the words out. Its not even that I really stopped talking, my voice just stopped. It killed me to even think about that option.  
  
"No," Michael shook his head. "We can do this." He smiled. He actually smiled. I didn't really think that was possible under the circumstances.  
  
"Have you considered the fact that this child is going to be... half...you know?" I really didn't know where that idea came from. Even though I am sure it should've hit me a lot sooner. I mean it's not everyday that a human alien hybrid is born.   
  
"I mean they do do blood tests and things like that when babies are born." Somehow memories of the whole sex ed in 9th grade came back haunting me. All the labor and hopsital procedures flew through my mind.  
  
"What are we going to do, Michael?"  
  
"I don't know. But whatever we do we do it together."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
  
I held my hand over my stomach. I as just waiting for some sort of signal from my unborn child, maybe a kick, maybe not. I was about three months pregnant. I stepped into the small green apartment. Yeah Green. Never my dream house but we had to make do.   
  
The last three months had been hard. We'd already been through four towns just so Mich...I mean Darick could find work. He told me not to call him Michael anymore. That was in the past and we couldn't live there. We had to live in the now.   
  
Yeah the now looked real bright. I managed to get a job at some grease joint on the outskirts of good ol' Russellville Arkansas. I had to admit though pay at "The House of Fry" was better than any of the fast food joints gave. Darick was out looking for a job still. He thought maybe construction.  
  
"Hey," I threw the mail down onto the small coffee table at the corner of the apartment. "Good day?"  
  
He shook his head. I lower my eyes from him. He was never in a real great mood after the "rejection days". I looked at him, he changed. It had only been three months but he'd changed so much. When we left he'd still been a boy. Now I stood staring at him, realizing he was no longer the immature little boy I'd left with.   
  
His shoulders had gotten a little broader. His eyes, they weren't really the eyes of a lost boy anymore, maybe more of a lost soul. The pregnancy was having some very profound affects on us both. Somehow he couldn't even bring himself to touch me anymore. He could barely look at me.  
  
At night we'd lay in the same bed but there was almost a million miles between us. He was puling away. Sometimes I could hear him murmur in his sleep, small little whimpers and cries of pain. I still think I am the one that caused that. I don't know how many nights, in our small green cockroach infested apartment he'd wake up with cold sweat.  
  
"Anything on TV?"  
  
He shook his head again. I closed my eyes wishing I had one friend I could talk to. Liz was galaxies away. Not literally of course. I mean, Roswell was only a few states away but I could never turn back. It was too late.   
  
"Put in anymore applications?"  
  
"yeah, there's a new tar factory opening outside of town. I put in two more at the tire place and at the garage."  
  
I took and big gulp of air. "I was thinking of names?" Inhale. Exhale.  
  
His eyes stayed on the television screen.  
  
"But apparently you don't care so I am just going to go and hit the hay." I made a fake stretch and walked down the hallway. Our wallpaper was beginning to peel from the walls. there was nothing like trailer park Arkansas. Nothing.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I watched Maria walk in. I couldn't look at her. I was afraid if I did I'd never be able to look away. Sometimes, though, when we were lying in bed and I was sure she wasn't looking, I would sneak a glance. I'd fight so hard just to not touch her. not to let my fingers run over the bare skin of her arm or her cheek.  
  
I could feel Maria's eyes burning into me. There were like an x-ray, penetrating my flesh. I gave a few one word replies. She said something about names...and bed. I'd be there later, much later. IN fact maybe not at all, the couch seemed like a safe distance tonight. Tonight was one of the irresistible nights.  
  
I flipped through the "crap" of late night television. Nothing but non-stop infomercials. Sometimes I just had an urge to pick up the phone and dial for Max. I just wanted to hear his voice, I needed to hear his voice. Once I'd actually called just to hear him say hi and then I hung up. Yeah, I know, real cool. Real Mature.   
  
The fact was though, I was only an eighteen-year-old boy. Was I supposed to be mature? Was I supposed to be a man? A father? A husband?  
  
Granted Maria and I were only married in our fake lives, I was still living the life of a tied down man. Not that I could ever desert Maria or anything. I would never do that. I just sometimes wish I hadn't gone down the road I did. Maybe we should have been more responsible. But too late now.  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I could hear her screams form the couch. I didn't end up going to bed that night, and now looking back I wish I had. I could hear each shrill sound piercing the silence. I got up as fast as I could. I ran, actually I think I might've flown. I don't remember my feet ever hitting the ground.  
  
I could see her small body twisting in pain underneath the sheets. "Maria..." I slipped. I forced her to call me Darick but then I called her Maria. It didn't matter though. "Maria." Her eyes weren't even open. I leaned forward scooping her body in my arms. "Maria look at me."  
  
I moved her chin in line with my face. Her eyes opened finally. I could feel the sweat on her body. "What's wrong?"  
  
Her lips moved like she wanted to talk, but she couldn't get the words out. Like it was a struggle. "Maria I'm here. You have to tell me what's wrong?" I could feel my heart jumping into my throat. "Is it..." I could feel hot tears sting my eyes. I pushed them back.   
  
That was the longest night of my life. Miraculously we both survived. Sometimes I really thought I'd lose her. I'd talk to her when I knew she was asleep. Whisper stories to her, about when I first saw her. I thought she was crazy, maybe not crazy, but definitely odd.   
  
she had changed so much. She wasn't the weak oddball she was when I first met her. She was strong. She was so strong. She has been my lifeline the last year we were in Roswell. My reason for existence. Max had his own problems but I had Maria.   
  
And then I had to look at her, reduced to a sickly corpse. There was really nothing I could do. I tried to heal her, I wasn't able to. I wasn't Max. I really wanted to just put my hand over her and make her ok. I tired, it didn't work.  
  
Sometimes when she'd relapse into the pains, I would try to heal her, knowing I couldn't do anything. Sometimes, God knows I knew that it wasn't her fault, but I'd blame her. I'd hold her and think, "If she wouldn't have gotten ..." I never really completed that thought though.  
  
I remember our last night in the green house. I held Maria all night. I could see all the pain in her eyes. She let small whimpers and moans escape. I think she thought she had to be strong, for me. I held her. I told her we didn't have to pretend anymore. That she was just my Maria and I was her Michael." I whispered stories that were almost like a far off life. Even though it had been our own.   
  
"Maria, you're strong. You'll get through this." I could feel wetness on my face. "Maria I love you." I knew the next morning we'd be leaving again, I wasn't sure if Maria could travel next door though, much less to another state.  
  
*~*~*~*  
  
Chapter 2 coming soon.  
  
  
  
  
  



	2. Down the Beaten Road chapter 2

Author: Nicole Alexandra 

Title: Down The Beaten Road 

Rating: Solid PG-13 so far... it will progress though(adult situations) 

Summary: An unexpected life comes when two of the Roswellian gang are forced into a difficult situation after a night of lust. 

Category: M&M 

Feedback: Please. Iris2003gl@yahoo.com 

Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters are property of UPN, Jason Katims, and Melinda Metz 

Author's Note: I wrote this fic for a specific purpose. After a day of reading fanfic I realized how much all those happily ever after teen pregnancy storied make me want to gag. I myself am not a pregnant teen but real life doesn't work out in a fairy tale ending. My purpose was to write the story and yes have the alien other wordly Roswell vibe but also depict a more realistic story Enjoy 

Dedications: To all the TRUEbies, Courtney, Liz especially for betaing and giving me feedback, and Laura. Also to Lindsay who actually is a teen mother, as well as Sonya who gave me the idea for this story. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

Chapter 2 

My eyes drifted open. I felt the car giving slight jiggles against the surface of the road. My eyes followed the dash as I slowly stretched upward. Pain shot through my entire body. I suddenly felt a wave a nausea rush over me. 

"Pull over." I growled. 

I felt the car swerve off the road. I climbed out the door landing on my hands and knees. I felt the bile rising through my chest. Any minute now, I thought. I could almost taste the acid in the back of my throat. I felt a comforting hand against my back. 

Suddenly it came. I felt the burning against my tongue. I opened my mouth and released the putrid solution. I groggily sat back. 

"Hey." I felt Michael's hands grip my shoulder. 

"Maria, are you ok?" 

I couldn't really answer, I just gave a weak nod. I tried so hard to stand. I lifted my leg and got up on one knee. My legs began to shake and I felt my body fall back against the gravel. I felt Michael's arms slide under me and gently lift my body back into the passenger seat. 

I felt myself relax a little when I was laid against the upholstery. A seat belt came down over my chest. 

"Are you sure you can make it?" 

I nodded and I began to drift off again. 

I woke up to fingers softly grazing the side of my cheek. 

"Hey." 

I saw Michael staring down at me. "We're home." 

I could barely remember our last home. I remembered green. Something was green. I really wasn't sure. It had been so long since I had actually been able to look at it. I had been sick for so long. I had been so sick. There were times I had sincerely wished everything would end. Maybe this was what I deserved though. I mean I wasn't the world's greatest kid. 

I attempted to hold my head up to look around. Michael came to the rescue when I failed miserably. His arms slid back under my body and he began to walk us to the door. I heard the squeak of the rusty hinges. Michael carried me a few more feet then laid me against the floor. 

"I'll be right back." 

I heard his footsteps walk away. I pushed myself up to a sitting position. I was beginning to wonder if human-alien mating was a good idea. Maybe it was supposed to be different. I mean maybe this really shouldn't have happened. It wasn't like I'd ever know. I couldn't just walk down to the town doctor and ask. 

I couldn't even see a doctor about my sickness. I just had to deal. What if they would discover something different? I couldn't let that happen. I was so scared though. I was scared that I might lose the baby, or myself. I was scared about everything. 

I saw Michael walk back through the door holding a rather large cardboard box. He laid it up against the door and sat down beside me. I felt the floor give a little beneath his weight. 

"Funny, ya know? I never expected when I moved into a house most of my stuff could fit in one box." 

I tried to smile. I lifted a hand and took his in mine. I let my fingers wrap around the sides of his hand. 

"Maria," he turned to face me, "I promise we'll get through this." He lifted me again and walked me to the bedroom. I landed against the hard mattress. He kissed my forehead and then walked into the next room. 

I listened to his footsteps scurry around a bit before they began to fade into the blackness. 

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 

I watched Maria sleep. She looked so... I couldn't even think of words to describe it. I just, I was in amazement that she was still going after all this pain. I picked her up and slowly carried her to the rusted brown car. 

I had always imagined bettering myself from what Hank and I used to have, but all these houses we had lived in, all these poor white trash communities gave me a sense of being back in that damn trailer. I probably would've been more uncomfortable if Maria had not been with me. 

I turned my eyes back to the road. I don't know why I started thinking about him , I just did. Max had been my best friend in the world, and I left him. I found myself wondering how he was. I wondered if he was with Liz, or in college. I missed him. I missed the way Max would rationalize everything and the way he had always been there for me. Like when I got sick. Max pulled through for me. 

But that was a different life. Now I was Darick Ross and now I had a family to take care of. I realized why I never let myself think about Max much. I turned back to Maria. I heard her croak out "Pull over". The car eased to the side of the road. Her door opened and she fell out. I ran out of my side pretty fast. I got there just in time to see the finale of greenish orange liquid spout from her mouth. 

"Are you okay?" 

She nodded, at least I think that's what she tried to do. I watched her attempt to stand. She feel back and I grabbed her. I slid an arm underneath her torso and lifted her into the car. 

We had about four more hours on the road. I got back in the car and we were off again. Maria went back to sleep pretty quickly. I didn't blame her either. It just would've been nice to have someone to keep me company. But hey, where did I have a right to whine? 

I watch each yellow line pass, each green city sign, each mile marker, each tree. Nothing changed mile after agonizing mile. After a while I began to sing those annoying car songs in my head. I got down to fifteen bottles of beer on the wall. 

Finally I pulled into our new hometown. Home sweet home was now Franklin, Texas. With only 6,000 people it was exactly a hub of the world or anything. But they had jobs and cheap housing and that's what I needed. 

Our house was across town, and though there were only 6000 people they were spread out over a pretty vast area. WE made it to the small run down duplexes. I went in to talk to the manager, leaving Maria asleep in the car. 

I came out and ran a finger across her cheek. 

"Hey there sleeping beauty, we're home." 

I supported Maria's body as we walked into the house. The walk was short in distance, but it took us about ten minutes just to get in the house. I laid Maria against a wall. "I'll be right back." 

I walked out to the car. I stopped and sat in the passenger seat. I felt my heart giving beating against my ribs. How could I go back in there and look at her like that? I took short shallow gasps. Hot tears stung my cheeks. I held my head in my hands. 

I tried to collect myself. I wiped the streaks of tears from my cheeks and tried to breath at a normal rate. I went back in carrying a large sized cardboard box. I set it against the back wall and sat down next to my Maria. 

"Funny, ya know? I never expected when I moved into a house most of my stuff could fit in one box." 

She grinned a little, or at least I thought she did. Her slender fingers wrapped around my hand. They were so soft beneath my calloused skin. Her hands had a feather-like quality. 

I loved the feel of Maria's hands. 

"Maria," I hesitated. I choked back faint sobs that burned against the back of my throat. 

"We'll get through this, I promise." 

I lifted her small body again. I walked us to the back room. I laid her against a ratty old mattress that laid on the floor. We didn't even have enough money for a bed frame. Welcome to poverty, I thought. I sat for a few moments staring at her. Her eyes were slowly drifting shut. I wondered if she was dreaming yet. 

I leaned down and kissed her forehead. I managed to pull away and for the first time in a long time I looked at her. I really looked at her. My eyes moved over her eyelids. They were round and perfect, her lips were pouty and sweet, her face... everything was a puzzle and her beauty was the final product. I tore my eyes away before I ended up staring at her all night. " I love you Maria." It was funny how I only said that when she was asleep or dying. 

I spent the next few hours organizing the new home. I put everything together the best I could. Maria was always better at this than me. Our homes, though small and dilapidated, always had a comfortable feel. She had that homey touch, she must've got it from Amy. 

I kept myself busy the rest of the evening waiting for Maria to wake. 

To Be Continued.... 


	3. Down the Beaten Road chapter 3

1 Chapter 3  
  
The weeks were beginning to pass a little bit faster. Each day I saw Maria deteriorate a little more. Sometimes when I knew she was asleep I would sit in the corner of our room and let the hot tears run down my face. I could see some inevitable unjust truth approaching. I didn't know exactly what that would be, but I could leave the worst scenarios up to my imagination.  
  
Sometimes, when I lay next to her, awake, holding her against me, I could feel our child. I remember thinking how amazing it was we had something we produced growing inside of her. I mean, I am not stupid. I realized we didn't have the best situation. Neither of us had ever intended for things to end up like they did.  
  
Then there were the nights when I could feel her own tiny body twisting in pain. Those were the worst nights of my life. I could only watch her. I couldn't make them go away. I wished I could take her place, take her pain away. In fact, many nights my eyes drifted to the phone, my way to Max. Max could help her. Max always was everything I was wasn't.  
  
The worst time was the morning. I would have to tear myself away from her. I had to go to work. I had to support the house, her, and our unborn child. But at work I was always on pins and needles wondering if she was ok. I'd go about tarring the roofs praying that when I came home she was still alive. I couldn't lose her. I didn't know what'd I do if I did. She was everything to me.  
  
Sometimes, while I was at work, slathering tar across the roof my thoughts would drift off to what we could've had. Maybe if we hadn't been so stupid, maybe, just maybe, we could've stayed in Roswell. Then maybe, Max could've saved her. But things weren't like that. That wasn't the reality, it never would be. The reality I lived in was at any minute I could lose the first person that ever meant anything to me. I could lose the first person who ever cared about me in a way they would've sacrificed anything.  
  
I remember the wave of relief I got everyday when it was time to clock out. I just felt like I could breath again. When I came home, I would cross the threshold of our poverty stricken poor-white-trash home. I never expected to ever live in anything that resembled Hank's trailer. I thought I had escaped that a long time ago. But the truth was I hadn't. When we left, we gave up any hope of ever becoming something. In fact, I gave up any hope of ever going home.  
  
I wondered if Max ever felt this way when he found out about his own son? I never considered it the same thing. I mean, my child was a real situation. I couldn't write it off as easily. Granted, he'd been searching for a way to save him, but no one ever thought the possibility existed. Everyone had gone on with life. Isabel ended up married and I ran away.  
  
"Maria, baby, I am home." I whispered in her ear.  
  
Her arms wrapped around my neck, as I leaned down to the bed where she lay. I felt her soft lips meet mine. It felt so good. Today was one of her good days. Her pain was at least subdued.  
  
"Hey." She smiled. I hadn't actually seen her smile for weeks.  
  
I sat next to her body. My own weight sank into the raggedy old mattress. I brought my hand to her stomach, tracing small circles around the bulge. I looked into her eyes and suddenly felt every reason I had fallen in love with her.  
  
"Have I ever told you I love you?" I kissed her once more.  
  
"What should I cook for dinner?"  
  
She smiled up at me as I stood. It was great to see her sparkle again.  
  
"Omelets?"  
  
She nodded as I left the room readying our dinner for the night.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I could feel the mattress move under Michael's weight. I never said anything, but every time he even moved an inch it shot pain all through my body. I never wanted to tell him that. Sometimes I just wished everything would end, or that I could at least take everything back.  
  
I hated when Michael woke up in the morning. Suddenly our pretend lives came slamming into us. The nights were nice though. I loved being able to go to bed as just Michael and Maria. But when we woke up we became Darick and Elizabeth. It made me feel sad. I realized I'd never get my old life back. The mornings were my wake up call.  
  
When he left for work, it left me an overabundance of time to think. My biggest regret to date was ever leaving Roswell behind. Why had I been so stupid and thought that things would be better on my own? In truth, since I was about five, I had always waned to leave Roswell, and now that I had it didn't look so bad. I missed Liz. I needed someone to talk to. I missed, Max and Isabel and even Kyle. Kyle was my child's would be uncle. He would've been a great uncle. And my mom, I could hardly bare o think about what she was going through. Was she wondering where I was at, that exact moment? Were she and Sean out searching for me?  
  
I could imagine life in Roswell. I'd get stares of course. "Oh look just like her mother. Her and that Guerin boy", but the people that mattered would be there. Then reality hit, I had an alien growing inside my womb. It would be pretty damn hard to cover up any abnormalities without exposing Michael in Roswell. It hurt to think, but if my baby weren't normal then I would lose the baby and Michael. I couldn't risk exposing him, but God I missed Roswell.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
I left that morning, like usual. I kissed Maria's forehead then walked out the door. I could feel my heart sinking into my chest. I was breaking our pact today. I walked to the mailbox, dropping a small postcard in, addressed to one Master Evans. Max was my brother; I had to let him know. I gave him Post Office box two towns over, to reach me at. I figured I'd covered up my tracks well. I had a different name, a different life. I wondered if he would still recognize me if he saw me.  
  
When I looked in the mirror every morning I could see the changes. My hands were swollen harder. My face more stern, older. I had had to grow up fast. My eyes held a thousand stories, as many as someone twice my age. Some days on my drive to work my mind wandered to Hank. I prayed I would be a better father to my baby. I sort of hoped Maria wouldn't come to her senses and walk out on me. I hoped he would never see what a loser I was.  
  
I drove away from our house, our run down house that I loved so much. What would Amy say if he could see us now? Oh yes, that Guerin boy really did a number on her daughter this time. Knocked her up and kidnapped her. I liked Amy, she was a good lady, but with me, in her eyes I know she saw me as her own past.  
  
I sighed. Too late thinking about that now. I pulled up to the large rectangular building. I wondered what the roof had in store for me today. I pulled on my old boots and walked in.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Life had changed for us. I was now five months pregnant. They had been five incredibly long months too. I could feel my body growing weaker y the day. The amazing part was I had survived this long. I f I could just hold on a little longer… That was a scary thought.  
  
In the time we'd lived in this house I had pretty much stayed in bed. I got up to shower; Michael brought me food and made me eat. Other wise, I would've withered away, dwindled down to a shadow of a skeleton.  
  
When I got better, I thought about the fact I had to get a job. What would I do with my baby? I thought about things like that now. Now that it was obvious it would emerge soon. I couldn't leave it at a daycare, what if someone noticed something? And then we had to buy baby furniture and clothes. We barely had enough to keep the house. Then the food, the diapers, the toys. How were we supposed to do this? It was all so much at once. I had a little saved up but nothing to afford all of that.  
  
That's if I had the baby. If I didn't die. I had to think about that too. I could die, what would happen to Michael if I did? Would he go back? What would he tell everyone happened to me? I died on some yearlong road trip? I felt for him. Never had the possibility of losing me been so close.  
  
Sometimes I wrote in a journal I kept by the mattress. Sort of, scientific, as Liz would say. I documented everything, from the pain I was in to what I felt. Michael. Let him know everything, which I couldn't possibly say right now. I could never ever let him know the truth, how much pain I was in, how scared I as, not while he was doing his best to provide for me.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
It was five, I was off. I had the whole weekend to be with Maria. I stopped off at the grocery store, bringing a small load home. I placed the various items in the fridge.  
  
" Maria, I'm home!" I called to her.  
  
I walked into the bedroom. She was asleep. I placed a tender kiss on her brow then went into the living room. I sat on the couch. I pulled out a piece of paper and pen. I began to write a letter to Max. The postcard was nice, but Max should've known what I was going through. I wrote for an hour. I had three pages. I told him everything, and I when I finished I crumpled the paper beneath my fist. Max still had a semi perfect life, who was I to taint that with my own fears and discomforts.  
  
Max had a son, somewhere. I had my unborn child staring me in the face, and I had to live with the fact it could be dying and so could its mother. But Max didn't need to know everything. What would he say if I told him? "I understand what you're going through."  
  
He would never understand, because the truth is he would never know. He would never know his child because, lets face it Max's kid as thousands of light years away. His kid was almost a figment of his imagination. My child was real, it was almost here, and it was dying. And that is what Max would never be able to come to terms with and understand.  
  
And then I wondered, if he did, could he help. The thought had passed through my mind a million times, but never once had it held the appeal it did at that moment. If I told Max everything, would he go to extreme lengths to find me and save Maria and our child? My baby was dying, and Max could help. What if I tipped him off? Would he gallantly ride in on his white horse, in his knight and shining armor mode and save the damsel in distress?  
  
I decided to push that thought to the back of my mind for the time being. Maybe, though, maybe it might come down to that, so I kept the thought on hold. 


End file.
